Mistake.

When you're losing ground on every front and a battle is going on inside your head, you need someone's shoulder to cry on and you need someone's ears to hear you out and You can't find anyone, when you have a helpless soul who is instinctively there for you when you need someone and that choice does not ring you. It's your own mistake.

- A philosopher whose veins are like particles.

ARE WE TERRORISTS?!?!?! (from Rohri, ma niggah!)

In this world of conflict perceived by some as the conflict between barbarianism and freedom, between irrationality and Science, between Muslim and a Jew or a Muslim and a Hindu or a Muslim and Christian. Now regardless of these perceived conflicts by the people of the world we can all unanimously agree that is not the case. But with all these perceptions, my confused identity asks itself, Are we terrorists?

Terrorism. What is terrorism? Terrorism is a systematic use of terror, specially in a means of coercion. Internationally, there is no universally agreement on the definition of terrorism. So i would like to look at my own country and ask myself this question. Well, if one thinks about it the whole world asks this question about us, where did we go wrong then? Don’t we desire peace, need it and or want it? Are we not creatures of emotions just like people in the rest of the world? And if not just that. Are all victims of terror are victimized by our people and or our own only? No, they’re not. We just like the rest of the world have our fair share of peaceful portions in the population. But there is no denying that Pakistan which was once known for it’s cricketing brilliance, it’s rich cultural history, it’s rivers and it’s cuisine is now known as an unsafe place and known for bomb-blasts.

In very simple words, it’s a small portion of the Pakistani population that is radicalized and follows a very Orthodox version of Religion, that too in their own form of perception of it and under such circumstance there is an identity crisis in our masses and they fail to understand that there are not two poles in this conflict i.e the foreign forces and the group that these forces call terrorists, there is more to this conflict there are more parallels to it than most us actually think. There are events, there causes and consequence to begin with...

There is corruption in this country. Tax evasion is rampant in the business community. All sorts of methods are used which are unacceptable to make money. State owned enterprises and other similar institutions are not functioning properly. On a smaller scale of things, not even a traffic signal is respected let alone other laws of the land and no law establishment agency stresses on implementing the laws which can bring change for the better. but having indulged in these details of the events, i would like to talk about their causes and consequences. It’s a vicious cycle, as one profits from the methods of corruption other loses his/her chances of social mobility or stability. On a broader scale, the rich gets richer and the poor gets poorer because of lack of regulation and the consequence of this is terror which turns out to be the cause of corruption.

Coming back to how the world looks at us. I would like to point out the fact that these problems are faced not solely by us but the lines globally between whats legal and illegal are blurred. But for us, events of terror have become an identity on a global scale. But that does not mean that there will be no end to it because our state is in doubt. An identity crisis, if these things are the things that we are identified with then along with them we are also identified by our cultural identity. And both do and do not go hand in hand. Bomb blasts do not faze the operation of the machine of this country. Despite the terror, we don’t do anything involuntarily and ourselves are

in an internal conflict against it. Which is another factor to the whole scenario.

Having to analyze all the scenarios and the situations that i could, i conclude that no. We are not terrorists. Confused yes. But we are far from terrorists, Yes we have other problems than terrorism but we’re not in them alone. Other states face them too. In our daily lives each and everyone of us. Weather from the establishment or the masses is keen on focusing on his survival needs than his ideological wants and that can be both a great and a sad reality of our lives and our state but it surely proves that we are indeed not the terrorists.

I don't know what to say.

I don't know what to say. The state of Pakistan has cracked a portion of the nation which contains my tiny house. The rivers are running dry and tears are the sole support. Overshadowed by the blood's supply their demand has dried. In my golden age i never thought i'd see this day. But just like the late great Randy "The macho man" Savage used to say "... And the beat goes on." I have to admit the distrust in the society brought the best of me.

I don't know what to say. There are some people who in their daily lives are oppressed by their leaders and they would criticize them for the corrupt oppression, but then fail to prove themselves deserving of the right to criticize in the first place, they want all that their top brass owns for themselves and can care less about preaching the greatness of selflessness and righteousness to the illiterate less fortunate just because it takes time. These people deserve their leaders because they themselves are just as shallow and characterless.

I don't know what to say. I'm addicted to my drug and just because of all the insurgencies going on in North Waziristan and the rest of Pakistan, it's prices are rising. I'm in a sad state. Priceless scores. Damn, i can't pay priceless. So i seek refuge and surrender myself to technology. Only to hear that technology is sick of my craving, an itsy bit. I can't believe that technology is now thinking about what i say through a different way a very frightening way, considering how far i have progressed with technology. I'm afraid and my intelligence reports are fearing the worse to happen.

I don't know what to say. A great person once told me that money does not matter, all that counts are the people around you. It touched me. I heard this coming to me when the most important person in my life was towards either death or a path to a new life, i had literally lost my life. But my life came back to me, Unconscious with anesthesia while coughing, trying to relax itself while going into the intensive care unit. The glow on my life's unconscious face was priceless and from their what i had heard from the great person changed my life, but i think to myself are your extended ones worth it? I look to myself and think "NO!" not all the time but when someone looks up to you and changes your life even in sheer helplessness, it demands a "NO!" with more examination marks.

I don't know what to say. I'm aging and i'm getting lazier and lazier. Dark times in the nurturing process. Life's hopes are busy but i'm lazy and jobless. A perfect place for the devil to play his games.

Too bad, i think all i can do is make the 3rd sheesha of the day.

-The people i talk about and mentioned are my loved ones. I owe a lot to them, A LOT.